happy baby
Ah, to be young again! Who wouldn’t give pretty much anything to go back in time and be a child again, if only for one day? You were so carefree, your whole job was to play and learn how the world works while your parents made sure you didn’t end up in the hospital.

Never again will you look this thrilled to be sitting in your own poop.

And man, sometimes our parents did a terrible job of that. Everyone has a war story about the time their parents did something crazy with them that could have ended up with both of you on America’s Funniest Home Videos. But imagine if things had been worse. What if your parents completely sucked at parenting, or just decided that they had priority of their offspring? Then you might have been that kid being drug around the mall on a leash like some kind of reluctant doll:

He’s actually trying to hang himself but can’t get the monkey off his back.

Sadly, parents who would rather tape their baby to the wall than pay attention to them are all across America. If you think about it, it’s probably the reason kids are so screwed up these days. Troy Osinoff took a picture of one of these Captured Babies and posted it online, purely for laughs. But then he had an idea: what if he made a website where people from all over could share pictures of children being placed into ridiculous situations by their unthinking parents, and then make money off that site with ad revenue purely for laughs, and for no other reason than that? Such was the start of MyBadParent.com, the photo sharing site that now rivals the People of Walmart for craziness and popularity.

Walmart was forced to step its game up.

And now Troy has unleashed his latest project destined to help mankind’s future, or at least shame God enough to bring about the Judgement Day: My Bad Parent, a Paperback published by Penguin Group containing the Hall of Fame, err, Shame of the website.

It’s basically Troy’s photo album with all his favorite images from MyBadParent.com. Though there are words in it (mainly captions) the star of the show is the pictures of children being put through their paces.

Or put into a microwave, whatever your preference.

Its small size makes it the perfect coffee table reader, or you could use it to beat your children for asking to come home from weird Uncle Frank’s house early, interrupting your daily dose of Jagermeister and reruns of Full House. Alternately, with the holiday season coming up fast (at least according to the TV commercials) you could buy it as a gift for a relative with a sense of humor (though its not recommended you give it to your grandmother if you ever want chocolate chip cookies again.)

Not even Sigmund Freud could comment on this rationally.

To sum it up, if you like MyBadParent.com, you should buy this book. If you enjoy pointing and laughing at children being fed to raccoons, you should buy this book. If you need something to look at while you poop because you hate staring at the opposite wall and you just feel awkward (sort of like I do after writing that sentence) you should buy this book. Basically, buy this book, which you can conveniently find at Amazon.com for just 11 bucks, with free shipping if you spend 25 dollars or more. Seriously, feed Troy Osinoff’s need to help humanity by pointing out its flawed parenting methods, and buy this book.