In college and life, sometimes you get little bits of life lessons that wouldn’t make a whole article on their own. Here then, are all those drips and drabs of minor tips and hints put together in one easy to read Sunday list. Read it, learn it, love it, forward it. Enjoy.

 

*Never eat discount fish.

*Rent or split textbooks. Sometimes, buy used. Never, ever buy new.

*Make your own sandwiches. You’ll save hundreds.

*Don’t let friendships- especially High School friendships- simply evaporate. A text or Facebook message every few months is all you need to keep it alive. It’s great to have lots of people around. One will always come in handy when you least expect it.

*In a situation where you’d bring one condom, always bring two.

*Take pride in your work, even stupid work. Talent has to be honed. Laziness is contagious.

* Most liquor stores sell $1 nips of tasty flavored alcohol. Bring two into any huge party where getting alcohol will be difficult.

*Drinking games can be fun, but if it’s a drinking *contest* stay far, away. A drinking contest is a prequel to a “hangover-and-vomit” contest.

*Tweet like your girlfriend checks your Twitter, because guess what?

*Everyone prefers bullet-point format. Notice how you prefer it? Keep things simple when you can.

*Never, ever cheat or plagiarize. It’s college. If you’re really in trouble, talk to your professor beforehand. They want you to succeed.

*Do not text your high-school girlfriend. You are, however, allowed to text her back.

*A Freshman in a fitted hat is just misguided; a Senior in a fitted hat is to be avoided at all costs.

*Always err on the side of taking things slow with girls. College is a marathon, not a race, and being a predator makes you a bad person.

*Trust your instincts about the first week of classes. Drop, switch, and maximize. Don’t settle for a loveless class-marriage.

*Do not complain about the friend zone. Seek it out. Friends are fantastic, and, if you’re any sort of normal chill dude, you will meet and/or hook up with their friends. It’s a good deal in the end.

*Never confuse being a nice guy with being an entitled weirdo wuss.

*That being said, don’t be a mean weirdo.

*Never get the cheapest hard alcohol. The cheapest beer, however, is somewhere between allowed and recommended.

*Take a girl out on a date, dude. It’s the least-used play possible.

*Don’t hog the music. Other people is how you discover new music.

*Use Splitwise.com to manage your debts with friends etc. Life’s a lot easier when you can spot or be spotted for a pizza and everyone knows they’ll get their money back.

*Take at least one weird class that involves meeting people, like Intro to Acting. If it’s good, it’ll be fun. If not, it’s an easy A. Usually it’s both.

*Bragging about how much you can drink just means you don’t have a lot of brag-worthy skills going on.

*Talking trash about someone, on the internet or in person, corrodes the soul. If you’re going to corrode the soul, do it in more fun ways, like alcohol-water-gun fights.

*Greek yogurt is super healthy. Carrots and hummus are good for you. Find one health-food you like to balance out all the pizza you’re gonna eat.

*Decorate your room, you slob: a poster, a rug, and no clothes on the floor. That’s it. Don’t even make your bed. It’s spiritual fung-shui.

*Work in public. Other people’s eyes will keep you from getting distracted on Facebook.

*If you’re too shy to perform, be it in comedy, music, or any other art, do it, now. It’s college.

*Get life skills- being able to cook, knowing how to have a good relationship and being able to balance your budget are all crucial life-skills that you can practice now. All that is much more important than the C- you’re going to get in Astronomy.

*Never break up with someone just to try being single. It’s not that great.

*Don’t stay with someone just because you’re afraid of being single. It can be pretty great.

*Call your parents more. They did their best, and, chances are, you might need a loan someday soon. Nice to set that up in advance.

*Enjoy