Your dad emailed me this note. I’m just passing it along (I didn’t know he could type?). I hope he doesn’t do this every Tuesday morning though I get the feeling he will…

Hiya kid-o. You know your mother and I are always concerned with your safety ever since aunt Ellen lost you at the beach when you were four. (My sisters would never be so irresponsible.) Now that you’re living in your own place for the summer, I’m sure a security system is out of the budget. You have to be prepared for burglars, regardless.

Keep your car keys on the night stand, right by your bed at night. If you hear a stir at the front door and someone is trying to break in, hit the panic button. Though your neighbors are likely jaded by false-car-alarms, an intruder won’t stick around for long with so much attention in their direction.

Keep those hedges trimmed low to eliminate hiding places near your windows. You might also think about investing in a phony decal for a real security system — or just use your fancy computer to whip-up some signage online. And be sure to lock up every night.