I’m an extrovert.

That means college is more or less a social buffet for me, and if my GPA is any indication, I over-indulge. There are a few reasons to go out on a Monday night, but “my friend’s girlfriend’s sister is back from China” isn’t one of them.

Still, a few of my friends are more introverted or more specific, and for them, college can feel a bit lonely or constrained. They like more eccentric stuff, they’re softer spoken, and they don’t really drink much. What’s the social scene in college for them? Well, it’s whatever they want.

1. Think Like You

Don’t search apple trees for grapes.

If you want to find like-minded people, you have to think like you. If you don’t drink, don’t go to frat parties. If you like to write, maybe join the lit mag, or the student paper. See, you might be rolling your eyes at that. Those activities might not match your style, or maybe that sounds lame. Well, maybe they are. But maybe they aren’t, and if they are, you can drop it. Maybe the cute young lady in your philosophy class is in one of these groups, and that could be a lovely coincidence.

That’s the name of the game. Set yourself up for lovely coincidences.

2. Leave Your Room

Any adventure is better then no adventure. That includes the things that aren’t “for you.”

If you don’t really drink, don’t go to frat parties—but maybe do it if your friends are going. Put yourself out of your comfort zone. Maybe it’ll be lame and you’ll feel stupid, but all information is good information. You’ll feel less lonely knowing you aren’t missing out on anything you’d like. And if it is cool, woohoo! It’s cool!

Work in the library. People you know might be there, and even if they aren’t, who cares? You’re just working anyway.

Leave your room, dude. Take little chances and watch them add up.

3. Use Your Resources

If you want to do more, simply do it.

Hit your friends up and try to start up plans. Hit up your friends at other colleges to see if they want to visit you or if they want you to visit. Message people on Facebook to try to set up plans. The internet can even be your social friend for once, if you’re looking for cool events to go to and to bring people with. Everything is better than just being bored.

4. Start Again

Remember the beginning of Freshmen year? That was a glorious month where everyone wanted to meet everyone. Everyone was open, nervous, and friendly because, hey, why wouldn’t they be?

That’s because they were starting: starting college, starting to meet people, starting out in figuring themselves out. So, if you want to go back to those times, start again. Don’t start over: keep everything about yourself that you like and all your friends. But start again, from scratch. Meet people and talk. Ask questions. Explore your campus with fresh eyes, and who knows what you’ll find. Friendship? Dragons? Dragon-friends? You won’t know until you try.

Photo Credit: Genista